the misadventures of zydrate man
by jokergirl4ever
Summary: this is a humor or crack fanfiction that me and my friend claire came up with. i hope you guys like it read and review. i am not quite sure what to say about this fanfiction except that it will make you laugh.
1. Chapter 1

**The misadventures of zydrate man **

Disclaimer: I do not make any money off of this story. It is all for fun

A/n this is a crack fiction that me and my friend came up with. My friend Claire gave me the inspiration for this story and she was also my beta reader.

One quiet evening, sound pierced the silence. It started out small, but then screams erupted from a woman; "Help, someone! He is stealing my car, help!"

The man pushed the woman down to the ground and grabbed her keys that had fallen on the floor from the struggle; he jumped into the car and drove away.

Out of the shadows stepped a man in a blue suit with a red cape on. Trying to seem tough, but just coming off looking a little dumb, he struck a heroic pose and said in a booming voice to no one in particular; "I am Zydrate man!" He walked over to the woman, helping her off the ground. "Hello ma'am, can I help?" The woman was still shaken up, "That man he stole my car" she said.

"Don't worry ma'am I will get your car back!" Zydrate man zoomed off into the night, searching for her car. The problem was he kept running into stuff so it made it harder to really look. He finally found the car in an abandoned lot about an hour or so after he had started looking… it seemed weird that the car jacker would just leave it here. That was when his foot hit something on the floor and a crate came down on his head.

"Oh crap," he said, falling to the ground under the weight of the box. From the corner of the room walked Wonderslut.

"Mwahhhaha, the infamous Zydrate man! I finally caught you!" When Zydrate man got a good look at her he wasn't surprised at her name- she did indeed look like a slut, wearing black knee high boots with a gold trim and a light blue top with a short skirt.

Zydrate man could see her minions coming closer to him; he stood up, preparing to fight them. He grabbed a few zydrate vials from his belt and started to throw them toward the first minion, hitting him right in the eye.

"Ahh! Oh no!" He fell to the ground dead.

Zydrate Man punched the one that was coming up on his left, missing the first time, but hitting him on the jaw the next time.

He grabbed more zydrate vials, throwing them to the ground and zooming away. The minions were so dumb they didn't notice he had run away and continued to walk towards the acid zydrate. Some of the minions fell in, but once the first five fell in the others took notice and turned the other way. Zydrate man was sitting on top of the box acting dumb, not even caring that he was feet away from Wonderslut and she could take him down in a second.

"So what are you guys doing here exactly?" Wonderslut turned towards him "We are here to capture you, of course." She didn't even seem worried. Zydrate man jumped off the box and started to run circles around the bad guys….sadly it didn't do very much except make him very dizzy.

He stumbled around looking very lost. Wonderslut gestured for her minions to take him away, but it turned out Zydrate man was only feigning being dizzy, zooming away out into the night leaving Wonderslut and her minions behind. All that could be heard were the crashes he caused.

"Until we meet again Wonderslut," he yelled over his shoulder before running into a parked car.

He had almost forgotten to take the nice woman her car back. Zooming over to where it was parked he got in the car, trying to figure out how to make it work. He jammed the keys into the ignition and turned them; turning the car around and driving it back to where he saw the woman. "Here is your car back ma'am," he said, starting to walk away.

"Thank you zydrate man!"

He waved back at the woman before zooming right into a parked van and then hitting the driver too.


	2. zydrate man vs the frog people

It was a normal day in Sanitarium Island; everyone was just walking around doing what ever they do every day. Suddenly, people started to stop and looking around as it began to rain frogs. The only thing that made these frogs stick out was the fact that whenever they hit a person, that person would mutate into a frog person.

At that point everyone started to run around yelling "Frog people!"

Zydrate man walked out into the street, looking around.

"Well…we may have a problem," he said as a frog fell on his head, waving his hands around and running in circles like his head was on fire.

Out of a giant building walked WonderSlut.

"Yes Zydrate man, this is my doing, bow before me!" She started walking down the stairs, looking around as all of the people turned into frog people.

Zydrate man started to run toward Wonderslut, but he just ended up running right into a wall. He stood back up slowly and started to run again, getting almost all the way to Wonderslut- but he got stopped by her minions.

"Frog people, attack Zydrate man!"

All of her frog people started to hop slowly towards Zydrate man; he tried throwing Zydrate vials towards the frog people, and they seemed to be unaffected. He started to run around in circles, panicking. "Oh no! Frog people!"

The frog people were getting closer and started to tackle him. Under the bodies of the minions, you could faintly hear Zydrate man screaming "Frog people!" over and over.

Wonderslut was just standing there watching as her new minions took Zydrate man down. It seemed like Zydrate man had finally met his match, but then out of the blue came a blinding white light, it blinded all of the frog people and Zydrate man was able to get away in the confusion.

He stood up, stepping a foot away from away all of the frog people "Cower in fear Zydrate man! You are no match for my frog army!" For a split second it seemed like Zydrate man was frozen in fear, then he reached down to his belt and whipped out a Zydrate vial, throwing it at Wonderslut.

He was getting closer to Wonderslut and she wasn't even doing anything about it. "So, you think you have found a way to defeat me!" Wonderslut said, walking closer to Zydrate man. He in turn was walking closer to her, throwing another Zydrate vial at her.

"You always get this close Wonderslut, but I always find a way to get away. You will never- ahh!" Zydrate man tripped over one of the frog people that was on the ground. He saw wonderslut walking over. "…Never what, Zydrate man, I couldn't hear you."

Zydrate man slowly stood up and looked around, he started walking away silently.

As he was walking away something fell and hit him on the top of his head; he looked down at it, seeing that it was a spray can. "Wonder what this is…?"

He looked at it some more and managed to spray it into his eyes "AHH my eyes!" He ran around blindly and fell over, again. Standing up he picked the can back up.

"Well this must have a purpose other than blinding me…" he walked to one of the frog people, careful to not touch it, spraying it with what ever was in the can.

The frog person got less green, turning back to a human…and then disappeared into thin air

"Uh-oh, that person was a setback."

Zydrate man started looking around, thinking about what he could put into it to not make the people disappear. Finally, he looked down at the spray can. "…Ah-ha, ZYDRATE!" he yelled. Grabbing a vial off his belt and pouring it into the spray can as he shook it up, he walked over to another frog person, and, staying at arm's length, sprayed them with the mixture.

The frog person got less green and was looking more human. When he was fully back to normal, he didn't poof. Zydrate man started to walk around to the other frog people, staying at arm's length and trying to not touch them, spraying them all and watching them turn back to humans. Turning back to where wonderslut was, he saw she had run off.

"Until next time.." Zydrate man tripped over his cape, landing on his face before standing up and brushing himself off "…ouch, until next time Wonderslut!"


End file.
